Don’t be a emotional control freak!

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New years day morning 2018. I wake and stretch and my breastbone cracks, it feels as though my heartspace is literally breaking open after months of being stuck and stagnant. My awareness tumbled straight into my hearts consciousness. Happy new year. New years day, a full moon, a manifestation meditation. A day of letting go, opening and embracing whatever is to come. Oh yes sounds idyllic and wonderful doesn’t it? It was in fact the next instalment of a seemingly … Read More

Feeling ‘deranged’

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Vata derangement, in the world of Ayurveda, is a relatively common phenomenon, It is not something I had ever experienced, until now. Ayurveda is the ancient Indian ‘science of life’, a system that looks at individuals holistically and using the elements to put together individual constitutional types known as ‘Doshas.’ There are three different Dosha types and we all consist of all three, with different amounts of each in every one of us. We often have one dominant Dosha which … Read More

“Its not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.”

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Last week I climbed Ben Nevis, at four thousand four hundred and thirteen feet its the completely highest point in the whole of the British Isles. I didn’t even feel like going out of the house, let alone to Scotland (living in Devon it felt like a very long way for someone who didn’t even want to get out of bed!) I had promised my best friend that I would go with her and that, for her 50th birthday, we … Read More

Being fully human

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Analysing anxiety A feeling in the guts The pit of the stomach Gnawing, grinding, churning Total and complete unease Fear and dread An overwhelming urge to run Far far away As swiftly as I can Like a deer silent and swift in its flight To safety And yet Rooted to the spot Unable to breathe As though cryogenically frozen Muscle tension Pounding heartbeat of an elite runner Dilated pupils Vigilant watchful awareness Nothing can make it go away Feeling this … Read More

Rewriting Grief

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On 17/7/17 my partner of 17 years died. I was lying by his side as he took his last breath. It was not entirely unexpected but it was tumultuous, as was he. He was a complex person, full to the brim of life, love, laughter, so many thoughts and words, and yet always with a darkness and haunted sadness behind his blue eyes. I always knew that our time together was precious and finite and so I drank in every … Read More

Yoga in challenging times.

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This is my most favourite and often thought of quote from the Yoga Sutras of Pantanjali. “Undisturbed calmness of mind is attained by cultivating friendliness toward the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous, and indifference toward the wicked.”  What does this mean in actual daily life practice? Yoga is not just about stretching and relaxing on the mat, its about how we conduct ourselves in our day to day life. Yoga is a whole holistic life system. … Read More

Heartfelt experiences.

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My right arm and shoulder hurt. I had no idea how this had come about, it was at times very uncomfortable. Over the course of a couple of months I sought help from various sources, all holistic. Firstly the chiropractor. Wise words and an intense adjustment later I felt as though I had been run over by a herd of yak, but the shoulder did improve a little. Next the Yoga teacher. Several excellent movements to release the tension and to … Read More

Make your own luck, get grateful!

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‘You’re always so lucky’….thats what people often say to me. Am I? How do you know? What is luck? And what is our lifes purpose or destiny? How often do we connect with our real life purpose and how often does it pass us by? Yoga and other similar systems believe that when you truly connect with what the universe designed you for then things flow more easily, you follow your life purpose and the doors open more easily to … Read More

The coffee pot and the cat flap

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Attachment, non attachment. Dukkha, Sukha (remember last time?) Many years ago we had a coffee pot, a simple stovetop screw together affair that worked very well and made the best and most delicious coffee. The Dukkha (unsatisfactoriness with how things are) crept in. The ‘old’ coffee pot was given away (perhaps as we were moving on in other ways we felt we should get rid of that too?) and we sourced a fabulous looking shiny coffee ‘machine’, plug in and milk … Read More

The Orange Jumper

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Today I bought an orange jumper, from a charity shop in Nottingham. I have never been to Nottingham before. I have always longed for an orange jumper, just like the one I found today. Why? Because orange, the colour orange, makes me feel good, vibrant, uplifted, energised, motivated. I generally feel quite motivated and excited by life in any case, but this, I believe, is because I have this perspective on life, such as, an orange jumper helps things along … Read More

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